The key facts
Your ex has no right to share your images with anyone, ever. Doing so, or threatening to, is a crime. You can ask them to delete everything. You should delete theirs. And if they threaten you, you can report it to the police. You don't need to give in to any demands.
Asking your ex to delete your images
Most people will agree if you ask calmly. Keep it simple and in writing, so you have a record:
You can't force someone to delete images they were sent willingly, and you can't check they have. But asking, and having it in writing, matters if things go wrong later.
Delete theirs, properly
Deleting a photo from your gallery isn't always enough. Check:
- "Recently Deleted" folders on iPhone and in Google Photos
- iCloud, Google Photos, OneDrive and Dropbox backups
- WhatsApp, Telegram and Signal media folders, and chat backups
- Snapchat Memories and "My Eyes Only"
- Hidden or locked albums, and any other devices or laptops
- Old phones you still have
Keeping images of an ex isn't usually a crime in itself, but showing or sending them to anyone else is. Deleting them protects you both.
Change your passwords and shared access
- Change your phone PIN and app passcodes if your ex knew them
- Sign out of your accounts on any of their devices (check "Devices" in Apple ID, Google and social media settings)
- Stop sharing photo libraries, Family Sharing and location
- Check your cloud accounts for unknown logins, and turn on two-factor authentication
If your ex threatens to share your images
This is a crime
Threatening to share intimate images is an offence in the UK and many other countries, whether or not they actually share them. If they're using threats to make you get back together, stay quiet, give them money or do anything else, it's also blackmail, and in the UK it can be controlling or coercive behaviour.
Don't give in to demands
Giving in rarely stops the threats. It usually leads to more.
Save the evidence
Screenshot the threats with dates and their number or username.
Use StopNCII
If you have copies of the images, use StopNCII.org to help block them on major platforms before anything is posted.
Get support
In the UK, the Revenge Porn Helpline (0345 6000 459) supports people facing threats. If there's a wider pattern of abuse, the National Domestic Abuse Helpline (0808 2000 247) can help.
Report it
Call the police on 101, or 999 if you're in danger. Courts can impose restraining or non-molestation orders.
If they've already shared them
Follow our step-by-step guide: if your images have been shared. Read the law where you live in intimate image abuse.
Thinking ahead in your next relationship
- Agree early that images get deleted if you split up
- Prefer disappearing and view-once messages for intimate content
- Keep your face and identifying features out of photos
- See the safe sexting guide for more
Need help right now?
If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 999 (UK), 112 (Ireland/EU), 911 (US/Canada) or 000 (Australia).
- Images shared or threatened (adults, UK): Revenge Porn Helpline, revengepornhelpline.org.uk or 0345 6000 459
- Stop images spreading (worldwide, adults): StopNCII.org
- Under 18: Childline's Report Remove tool at childline.org.uk or call 0800 1111. Outside the UK: Take It Down
- More countries and services: see our help and support directory